Updates!

   Today is another day from our Creator! God is good and I am a BLESSED lady! The temperatures feel like Summer has decided to stay, but I think I'll believe my calendar. Fall has to come sometime, especially here in IN. Maybe I should move to Montana and experience a real Winter this year! It sure is tempting!
   Can't wait to travel again. Spring 2012, here we come! Montana, old friends, and who knows where else I might end up? My true self is adventurous, the kids have just kinda slowed me down for now. :)  I miss my team and all the traveling that came with it.
   Some friends were here last night and some of the things she said just blew my mind! They came to show me a business opportunity and she said I was the first person she thought of when she saw it because she knows that I can do anything. (her words, not mine) She believes in me that much. Wow, do I feel like a heel! I don't even believe in myself that much anymore. Sadly, it's been hard to convince myself that I can do anything again. Some days I'd rather cry than try. And then I think 'stop feeling sorry for yourself and get off your arse and DO SOMETHING' with your life. No, I would never talk to anuone else like that, but I've always been that hard on myself. It is time I stop it and realize that I am not a superwoman. I am human and I shouldn't expect more from myself than I do from anyone else!
  With that being said, I am going to get my hair cut as soon as the youngest munchkin wakes up. :) YAY! I have not had my hair cut by a professional in probably almost a year, I keep doing it myself. But it is getting to me. It's long and yet really thin because it keeps falling out the last 2 months! AGH!! I know, just post baby stuff going on, but still! Please!
For some reason this week has been tough. Today I decided to pamper myself a little and so I have a book that I read a little bit of and this morning I had a candle burning. It was so nice! The candle smells so good, it makes you want to eat it! Makes the whole house smell good! I had ordered this candle off my supplier just so I can see the quality and was hoping to sell it eventually. Unfortunately I put it into a bag with some other things that were metal and the candle is in a glass container, so you can guess what happened. Yep, it got broken! So now I get to enjoy it. Yes, it was still usable! So I wanted you guys to see it too! You can go get one off my website if you'd like! www.ourfamilyshop.yolasite.com. There are a lot more cute things there, you might just enjoy yourself!   

  Well, I really need to get off the computer and get some other things done. Hope you have a great evening! God Bless all who read this!

Now go and do something to show someone you appreciate them! You will feel so good afterward!

Well here it is, heading towards fall and cooler temps. I am loving it! Today I went on a bike ride and I was amazed at the weight in the cart just from the 2 babies. WOW! I am out of shape, lol! How did that happen? I've always been able to bike for miles without stress. ha ha! 4 kids later............lol! So anyway, it was fun. We got rained on slightly, nothing major. Just enough to make us wonder whether it was going to pour or wait till later?! It waited. :) The last few days I've spent quite a lot of time outdoors and the house is showing it. Although I think I have to in order to keep my sanity. My baby has been fussy and the 2 year old is fighting a sinus cold and sore throat so if we stay outside at least everybody is happy. :) But then I still have to come back in and face the dishes and dirty floor and the fact that the girls need their baths. Ah, but I love being a mom!

Here's my news for the day- I now have my own business, actually a few of them. I have my own website and also am selling some retail items. I'm more excited about sales because it gets me around people, I think. I love the products, too!! They really are great quality products. Of course, I had to get some things for myself before I could tell every one else this, lol! I love working with people and I love helping people get things they like and need. No, I'm not the kind of sales person who comes pounding on your door and demands that you buy my products because I have the best and cheapest around (which I might) but I believe in making people happy. My reward is in seeing people smile because they are happy with their purchase. So my number one priority is customer service!!! Absolutely!

So I was just looking through some of my items and realized I can get the exact color curtains I've been wanting! Yay! And they're pretty cheap! Only 9.70 a pair for a set of them 58 X 84. So, I'm getting some coral colored curtains for my house. It's seriously time to do some decorating! And if you've ever been here, you know what I mean. I'm not a decorator, but I will try. :) Anyone wanna come over anytime soon? Lol, you can help me redecorate?!


But I need to move on tonight. I have more to do and the house is finally a little more quiet now that the trouble maker is in bed. :) Love and Blessings to all!

Beautiful Day!

Good Morning World! I am in love with my creator! He has BLESSED me in so many ways.

And yet, I feel grouchy this morning. What is up with this? Maybe because I stayed up too late and have been staying up too late for a bout a week now? Or because the girls were sick and I'm still recovering? And the fact that I had a chiro treatment yesterday and then went and cleaned house right after. Yeah, that was dumb! OUCH! Lol! Ah, well, life goes on.

So my to do list is pretty long today. And since I am kinda stuck at home (I left my purse at mom's), it's time some things got done. The yard needs a little help and it's really been a while since we had to mow but parts of it need to be mowed. Oooohh, hard work! Might take 20 minutes, lol! That was sarcasm for those of you that can't hear my voice. My yard isn't big enough to be considered a yard if you would ask my opinion, but there is some grass there at least. I love big spaces where you can lay in the grass and stare up at the sky.  I should really trim some branches too, there is almost no sunshine hitting the ground in front of the house. Yes, it's nice to have shade but there is mold growing on the side of the shed because it just can't dry out very well. And the bottom of the trailer is very wet! Not good!

So anyway- there are dishes sitting on the counter waiting for someone with enough courage to wash them. They stayed there yesterday because I had quite the busy day and was exhausted when I got home. Still--- there should be a 'no excuses' law in this household with punishments attached. Maybe I would get more done that way, lol. I seriously have struggled with my self-discipline since Ronnie has been gone. Before that, the thought of 'I don't feel like it' was not even there. Then along came Ronnie and just totally TOOK it from me. BEWARE- the power of association!!  It is really powerful!! Now the work involved to get it back is strange indeed! My mom had taught me as a child not to make excuses but this time I have to teach myself and let God do some work in me to change mindsets. God has done so much already this past year, but I know there is still a long way to go. And I am thankful every day for all HE does!

I wish I could change my circumstances immediately, but God says I have to work harder for it, oh darn, lol! 

And now- OH MY! Elijah has poison oak all over his face! What do I do to get through to this child STOP SCRATCHING!!! He keeps scratching and scratching and has had it now for almost a month. I am so at my wit's end with him. He is so allergic to it, he could literally die if I don't deal with it and he doesn't seem to get it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Steroids is the only thing that has knocked it out yet this year....he got a cream a few weeks ago, but it hasn't taken care of it.HELP!! Why!!!!!??? I have enough to do without having to put stuff on his face every hour. And since it's right by his eyes, I don't even know if I should! I'd rather cry right now then deal with this again!!!

And here I titled this post beautiful day..... yes, it still is, it's just looking a little discouraging to me at the moment. Hope you all have a good Saturday- those who might read this, lol!

Life

So here it is, supposedly the second day of school. Is Elijah in school? No- the poison has struck again! Ay yi yi! So now he's taking allergy pills and  dousing himself with a baking soda and vinegar solution every so often. I'm praying it will work again this time. Never know what will work.

So anyway- I was looking forward to him being back in school because it just is so crowded in this little house when everyone is home. Hello! How's a mom supposed to clean? It's like shoveling snow in a blizzard- not very effective.

This last week was pretty rough. I didn't think it would hit me so hard that it's been a year now since Ronnie left. But- it hit hard! Rendered me incapable of taking care of everything. Smacked me again right between the eyes that I'm alone with 3 kids. Physically, financially and emotionally. Yet God reminded me that HE is my husband, my provider, my Jehovah-Jireh. I am ever so thankful for my Savior!  Without Him, I am nothing. I would be lost forever, probably homeless and without my children. I have a home, a car, clothes on my back, air conditioning, children who love me, a mom who is amazing, a church family, and so much more that I can't even fit on here.

With all that being said, I am struggling so hard to make ends meet financially. HOW am I supposed to do this? I now have the ability to make big profits, but finding the resources and time to do it is almost crazily hard. With 2 babies to pay a babysitter for when there's hardly enough money to pay a phone bill, how do I do that? And in order to work, I need to figure it out. I pray and I pray, yet God says "Wait on me, I will take care of you". What?!?!?! Wait- for how much longer??!!??!?? I feel like I've been waiting for forever. I'm sorry Lord, I know you are God of all, I just don't understand. Please, forgive my unbelief.  Why would God WANT to take care of me, I've completely messed up my life in every way. I get judged by it every day from someone! Yet God loves me. I still feel so unlovable.  My son's Father doesn't help it!

This was my weekend to have my son. He was with his Dad working out of state with the agreement that when they got into town, he would contact me and then I can come get Lyndon. That never happened. So Saturday comes and I finally call him. They are out riding four-wheelers and he never gets the message till too late, I was gone for the evening. (Or so he says) So Sunday afternoon he tell me I can come pick him up. Right!! An hour away and then take him back in 3 hours!!! Are you nuts!?!?!?!?! Good grief! He has always been this disrespectful and I am SO sick of it!! Makes me feel like crap.

OK, I'm starting to feel a little better. Sometimes a woman just needs to vent! Whew! 

Attitude

So here is how my day started out.........

Got woke up at 3:30 AM to my 22 month old crying, wanting into my bed...hmmm, fine! So I grab her, plop her down and we both go (hopefully) back to sleep. Nope! She pukes on my pillow, sheets, me, and herself! Dinner, dessert and milk.....yeah, u can imagine! So I rinse us both off and grab the sheets, rinse them and throw them in the washer. Now I give her some Virus be gone stuff and something to take down her temp and we lay down again. Now I really want to sleep, but I know what usually happens when she's sick. Puking every 5 minutes, usually NOT into  the bucket. But- I laid down anyway, praying for mercy!  

By the way- I had my first appointment this morning to sell some candles! And I canceled it due to the sick daughter....I REALLY needed this appointment!!! 

Amazingly, she sleeps and there is no more puking! Wow!! First time for everything! Woohoo! Praise The Lord!!! *sigh* OK, now- breakfast.....

"Mom, this milk smells funny! I think it's spoiled!" "OK, well- we will just take a bike ride to the store and pick up a few things but we will have to eat something else for breakfast, I guess." Hahahaha! We eat, get the bikes ready and get the girls strapped in.....and it looks like it wants to pour rain! OK, so we went about a quarter of a mile, turned around and came back- JUST a the rain started! OK- scratch that idea!

Now what, Lord!? What do I do to make this day productive? And what was his answer? "Love yourself" Wow! He knew my thought better than I did, 'cause I was getting mad at myself for my situation, since it's my fault! And getting mad at my husband who took off and has never helped with anything. Now I have 4 kids, no support whatsoever and I am blaming! Ay yi yi! I know better! But- I AM HUMAN!! OK- it is WAY past attitude check time!!

How do I- aha! That's where the problem is! God is in control, not me. Yet, I still catch myself thinking 'how will I'......... So God reminds me that HE is our Provider, Father to the fatherless, my DADDY, my GOD!! Praise Him!! Now my attitude is adjusted, I can go on with a smile on my face- knowing HE is in charge, HE orders our steps. I love you, Lord!! Thank you!

The Lord's work

Good Morning, world! God is good, His love and mercy is new every morning. I am thankful for this, otherwise I'd never stand a chance of getting to see Him face to face someday.

This morning God has laid on my heart to pray for a dear Lady who just lost her husband this past week. This morning she will be getting ready for church without her dear husband. They were so in love and had a wonderful relationship. He was a wonderful Daddy to their 4 children. My heart aches for her and I weep with the pain she must be feeling. I'd rather go through it than to know someone else is and I can't take it from them. Sometimes it feels like a curse to have this big heart that feels everyone else's pain, but it is a blessing, it means I can empathize with others. I keep praying for her but God has not lifted the burden yet- He says I am to bear some of her burden for her and I will gladly do this. I've been there already. I came through some of my darkest days and can now see a small glimpse of light and Hope. Hope that I could not see 2 yrs ago. Hope that I couldn't see even 1 yr ago.

Yesterday I almost felt 'normal' again. I am back in business! Yeah, baby! God loves me and has plans to prosper me, not to harm me. Problem is, I've tried to take myself down too many times. The time has come to change the direction of my life. With God all things are possible!
Here are some books I love, if you'd like to read- have at it! They changed my life!  

BLESSINGS

OK, so I am seriously just turning on my computer and logging in so I can write this. I feel like I am the most BLESSED lady on the planet tonight! Someone dropped off 2 big boxes of baby clothes on my doorstep while I was gone over the weekend! And I will probably not need to get any other clothes for my baby ever again. Hopefully I can pass Kaylee's clothes down to her sister. :)

There was an answer to prayer in one of these boxes! I have been wanting to go walking but haven't had a double stroller or a baby carrier to use, and there was a very nice baby carrier in there! Praise the Lord, I am so blessed! I was crying when I pulled it out! My Father in Heaven knows what we have need of and He provides in amazing ways. It wasn't in my time frame, but in His. I thought I HAD to have something a long time ago already, but wasn't able to get anything. I decided I would be patient, and I think it was worth it! My heart is seriously overflowing tonight. God is SOOOO GOOD!!! Yes, even when things are NOT going my way, He is still good. :)

A new life!

   I haven't written in a while since I've been busy trying to adjust to life with a newborn in the house. :) It's really been wonderful. She is such a good baby! She's beautiful and healthy, already gaining and changing her looks. Time goes so swiftly and I want to treasure every moment with her. The boys enjoy having her to hold sometimes too, which is cute to watch. They are really good big brothers. Kaylee always asks for Lyndon when he's not here. As soon as she sees him, she wants him to hold her. It does a mother's heart good to see the kids get along. I have never been close to the only brother I have, so I want my kids to appreciate each other.  Here is a little pic of my newest princess. She is a good sleeper and is actually asleep right now, as I should be also! But I wanted to share a little of my Blessing with you. :)

  I don't really have a whole lot to say tonight, just want to wish every mom a Happy Mother's Day on Sunday. God's richest blessings are in our job of mothering, I believe! Be blessed!!

My new Princess

I am home again, after giving birth on Sunday night at 8 PM to a beautiful baby girl named Cassandra Rose. She weighed in at 6 lbs and 15 oz and was 20 inches long. She has a head full of straight black hair and dark eyes. She's a happy baby and sleeps well, eating when she's hungry. Which isn't that often, I might add! :) I am having a tough time sitting on this chair so I'm not going to be writing much for a while. I wish you all well!

Blessings to all!!

Lori

Elijah the little chef :)

I am still waiting for this baby to make an appearance, so am taking care of things and getting everything ready. The house is straightened up, there's food in the refrigerator, even though I'd like to make some things yet today. But I've got to tell you about this little budding chef I have in my house!

Elijah enjoys cooking occasionally and this morning was wanting to make something for me. So when I asked what he wanted to do, it didn't sound very appealing. But- being the mom who never wants to squelch the enthusiasm of my child, I said OK. And boy, was I glad I did! We cut up an avocado into a bowl, put the juice from my salsa I made last night over the top since it was lime juice and that was what he wanted to put on top, we sprinkled some garlic powder on top of that, put a few slices into a tortilla and wrapped it up and ate it! Mm, mm, mm!! Boy oh boy was it delish!  Yummy for my tummy! So he tells me that the neighbors had this one time when he was over there playing with their son and that's where he learned it. They always feed him, it seems. They are good neighbors. And Hispanic at that, so I've gotten a few wonderful recipes from her! They have helped me start my car when I left the lights on and the battery died, lol! The husband has come over here and helped me with my computer, and I can't even remember what else!

 And now, Elijah is telling me to let everyone know that he is making paper guns to sell. He is quite the little entrepreneur too! He made a few of these guns by watching some youtube videos and has now sold some to the neighborhood kids. Which I happen to find funny, but hey- it works! He has sold a few things he has made before.

So anyway- here I am, just waiting, waiting, waiting! What can I do to speed things up? Maybe a long walk? Oh yeah, the midwife said I need to be eating every 2-3 hours and drinking plenty of water. And now it's ben 3 hours since I ate- oops. Guess I need to go eat.

Later, my amigas!

Ceviche and Pics of my princess :)

I just had to share my little baby doll with you all! Today I made something new and she actually LIKED it! OK, you must understand, she got her father's taste-buds and is very picky! But this is a picture of her enjoying her new love, yay! I made 'ceviche' today, a Mexican dish with cilantro, shrimp, lime and lemon juice,onion, ketchup, avocado and Orange Fanta pop. Yes I know it sounds like quite the strange concoction, but let me tell you it is DELICIOUS!! Mmmm, Mmmm, mmm I love it! OK, mine did not turn out quite the way it was when I first tasted the neighbor's, but it was still really good. It's to be eaten with crackers and so my little Kaylee was dipping away and enjoying herself. Of course, this was after I tried to give her a taste and she barely stuck her tongue out to taste it, afraid she might not like it. Seriously, I wish I could show you what she does, it is so funny! She always has to make sure she likes it before you can get any into her mouth! Just a nibble- mousy bite if even that much, lol! She lights up my life!

Oh, and there's a picture of my daughter and I that was taken by a friend of mine today. She does a wonderful job, I am so in awe!  You can check out www.kissphotography.net. She really loves what she does and it shows!! I am thinking about letting her do pics of the baby when he or she finally makes an appearance. :) And no, no baby yet! I am sitting here having some good contractions though! Hmm, will it go anywhere? Time will tell, right? I have had so many BH contractions that I think I have given up hope. I'll just be pg forever, lol!

OK, OK I need to get to bed right now as I haven't been sleeping too well and we all know I need my rest and strength to have this baby. And yes I know it won't be forever, lol!

So I will say Good Night all my friends- Oh, by the way- who all's going to Starbucks for a free coffee tomorrow? ME, ME, ME, ME!!

God Bless!
Lori

Mothers of Preschoolers

Tonight something entirely different is on my mind. We had our Teen Mops meeting tonight and it just got me to thinking. One thing it does is energize me, strangely I was extremely tired when I left the house. Yet when I got around these ladies and babies, I forgot my tiredness. The coffee helped, lol! But the reality of it is- when we serve others, we can't help but be blessed! I have never served on any committee of any kind before or volunteered for any length of time like this has been. I don't regret a single minute of it. Actually, it has probably helped me more than I helped anyone else. I love to serve, love making others smile. But sometimes I wonder if anyone knows I'm alive, you know- when you have one of those days! The kids are not cooperating, nothing goes your way, blah, blah, blah....! You know what I mean, right? We all have them!

But tonight, I saw raw talent! The craft was creating a flowerpot and planting some flowers in it so you could take it home and watch it grow. So there I sat, watching the girls decorate their pots. Why wasn't I participating, you ask? Well, to put it mildly, I CAN NOT stand the feel of a terracotta pot! :) Just a little quirk I have. (haha) So anyway- I am watching these girls decorate and it hits me! They are all so creative! And I am so NOT creative! I loved watching them put these polka-dots and flowers and stripes and everything else on their pots. It was just so cool, and not one pot looked cheesy! Every single person had a very pretty new item to take home. I was proud to know them and now that I look back, I should have pointed it out a little more, I guess. Because everybody likes a compliment, right? So here I sit, thinking of all the talents that these girls have and they are not even aware of it! God help me, how can I make a difference? These beautiful teen mothers who I know have a tough life to handle, yet are smiling and having fun. The baby is in the nursery so they can have a few moments alone and we all know they deserve it! So on May 10th, I can't wait to pamper them! I pray that they will ALL show up!!!


Here is the book that we have been working out of this year. It has some valuable lessons for young moms! If you know someone who is a teen mom, send her one or direct her to us. We would love to have them and get to know them! I want to encourage all young mothers- this too shall pass! God loves you and so do I!!

Something else I'd like to share- I recently read this book called And the Bride Wore White: Seven Secrets to Sexual Purity. by Dannah Gresh. Fabulous book! I wish someone would have shown me this when I was a teen! My life would've been so different! Let's share this with teenagers! I'm calling all mothers, aunts, friends, neighbors and anyone else who is around a teen girl. Please, read and learn! God has the rules for purity for a reason, for our own good. But even though I knew that, I did not know the reasons or what the big deal was. This book really enlightened me! Teens need to know why and what it does when we give up our purity!

Well, what brought me to this book is the fact that we are planning a 'Tea' for the girls on our last evening of the year. And I am so excited! We get to show them just how special they really are and how God sees them! This book talks about it a little, but there's a whole other workbook to go along with it and a very dear friend has shared it with me, so I am excited to share this with someone else!

With this, I must say Good Night. Morning comes all too soon for me, lol!

May God Bless you!
Lori

Just wanted to share a hug with you all! :) God loves you!

     Hello, friends! I've missed you, lol! The last few days have been pretty hectic, but today is the Lord's day and I take that seriously and get rest and spend time bonding with my kids. Right now, the dishwater is still in the sink because I'm not done with lunch dishes, but I needed a break, ahhh! Sounds lazy now that I say that- Oh well!   
     So here it is afternoon and time for Kaylee to take her nap, but I would like to take the kids and go walking out by the Goshen Dam. It's so beautiful out there. Even though it could be warmer, it could be much colder too. So I appreciate the fact that I don't need to wear a jacket and am planning to take advantage of the weather while we have it. Who knows when it will change again, this is IN, right?
     Lyndon is playing with Kaylee on my recliner and it's so fun to listen to him. He's so good with her! He put her to sleep yesterday when it was nap time. And yet he is so shy, that he refuses to get to know anyone at church. What's up with this phenomenon? Teen years? Or rebellion? Good grief, it was a fight to get him to church this morning, but somehow we made it!
     Elijah is my outside buddy. He's off playing soccer across the street, his favorite past time.
     The boys have wanted to spend quite a bit of time on the computer playing games and watching movies, so I told each of them they need to read books to earn time. So Lyndon has picked up Personality Plus- one that really helped me a few years ago and taught me a lot. Personality Plus: How to Understand Others by Understanding Yourself. Special Feature: Personality Profile Test. (Revised & Expanded Edition 32 printing, June 2000)). It helps you learn how to get along with people better, to understand others and accept people as they are. I believe this could fix many relationships, it helped me in so many ways. Helped me accept my kids' differences and to teach them to accept each other instead of making fun or laughing at each other. We all have different needs, wants, abilities and gifts. So if we appreciate each other and work together, we can all accomplish more than we ever can be alone. So, hopefully he will find something in the book that will help in some area of life. :) Learning is good! 



Ha ha, I just got fresh pineapple out to snack on and Lyndon says I'm strange, lol! ;) That's OK, I'll be strange if it means I'll be healthy. I also want to make some carrot juice this afternoon. Goodness, I am planning too many things instead of resting, aren't I? Well, I want to feel better!! I feel like there's junk in my body that needs to be deleted. So in order to do that, I have to put the good stuff in! So here we go.......time for salads, fresh fruits, veggies, and whole grains. Oh, and I've eased up on coffee. :)

I think I want to tell you all about a book I just finished reading called Ordinary Women, Extraordinary Lives (Including a 5-Step Plan for Self-Empowerment). I found this book and just thought it looked interesting since I have gone through some crazy things in the last two years and need to change my life. But for some reason I have not had my 'AHA' moment that is needed in order to make some serious changes. I want to, in the worst way- but I just haven't been able to yet. In this book, it says that you can't rush it, it just comes when you're ready. Ugh! But I will continue to strive forward everyday and pray for God's leading. Because ultimately He is in control and I want to be in His plan. This book was very empowering though, and opened my eyes and made me cry quite a few times. Inspiring stories of women who have gone through years of abuse or addictions and then pulling themselves up and changing their lives into something beautiful and serving others.

Lord, make me into what I ought to be! Mold me and move me, shape me but above all lead me.

This too shall pass?!

OK, so this blogging thing is not quite what I expected, but it is fun! It's just different! Wondering if anyone even reads anything I type, or if I will ever make a difference for anyone. I know that we all have so much to give and so much that we know, it's just a matter of finding the right person to share it with. Today I was reading my Bible and found the verse in Luke where God basically told me---trust me and stop wondering how you will live or eat tomorrow-- I take care of the lilies and they don't even work or try to take care of themselves. I know, I know- I just need to be reminded some days, I guess. Thank God that He doesn't give me what I deserve, but rather extends His Grace to me every day. If only we will have the faith of a mustard seed, we can tell the mountains to move and they must obey. Of course, that doesn't mean we will see them physically move immediately, but rather that God can and will show us how to move that mountain so we can go forward. I used to think it meant the mountain should automatically move and if it didn't, then I didn't have any faith. Wow, thankfully I learned better, but it took me a long time!! Lately I wonder just where my faith is.


I feel lost, needing someone to tell me what direction to go. Yet- when I did have that, they weren't always correct, either! God has shown me His awesomeness and how He can direct my paths perfectly, yet I don't see it happening right now- all I hear is WAIT, WAIT!! I am so frustrated! WAIT for what?! I want to do something, contribute something to life. I guess it's as my friend said this morning- "I grew a baby today, what'd you do?" It is a wonderful thing, just some days doesn't feel so wonderful. I'm moody every day, bloated, with fat toes that hurt, clothes that aren't fitting anymore, can't sleep after I wake up the first time to go pee. Just frustrated!! This too shall pass, I know this, yet I cry for the frustration. How long must I wait? What am I waiting for? What!?

Financial crisis?

Well, I hope you all had a Happy Easter yesterday! We had a good day spending time with my mom. It was also her birthday, so it was a special day. Got to see my brother and sister in law and the kids and ate dinner at their house. Relationships are funny things. I finally decided it just doesn't matter what they think of me or how they treat me, I will be myself whether they like it or not. So yesterday went really well except for the fact that my daughter was on strike when it came to food, lol! Teething is just NOT a fun stage to go through- for the child or the parents, right? This too shall pass. :)


So what am I talking about today? Maybe just random things? Sometimes this is a way for me to just get stuff out that's in my head, since I don't have another adult here to bounce things off of. Talking to myself makes my kids look at me funny! ;)


Elijah is outside stomping our aluminum cans that the neighbors bring down here. They brought 3 bags down here and there are all kinds in there, from beer cans to energy drink cans. They happened to see me gathering up cans when I went walking and so they started bringing all of theirs for us to turn in. Works for me! The only problem is that when we get some bags on our porch and they don't get taken care of for a few days, Kaylee tends to want to play with them- after all, it's noisy, right? ;~) But it's gross!! The cans are not dried out nor are they rinsed out, so you can imagine what we have in the bottom of the bags! Yuck! My mom also collects some when she goes for a walk or whenever she drinks pop, she saves them for us. So I am thankful for every little bit I get, it can mean a tank of gas for me! We do anything we can to help with finances.

How does your family keep up with finances? I recently got a certification in being a Personal Finance Counselor and really enjoy helping people with problem-solving in finances. I have had plenty of experience, so it's fun for me to share it! There is a book I read that really helped me out the most, called God's Plans For Your Finances. This book really packed a punch! I got rid of over 80 Thousand in debt in 2 years. It took some hard choices and doing without, but BOY was it worth it!!  The feeling of freedom is so amazing! And now I know there are so many people struggling with debts and insecurities about their money and I would love to help. Do you know anyone who wants the help? I love the challenges of figuring out how to change things things in finances. So for anyone wanting to make some changes, but not sure where to start, I would love to help.....you can find me on Facebook as Lori Hochstetler if you are not comfortable leaving me a message on here. Please feel free to send me a message and I will be sure to get back to you as soon as I am able! I look forward to hearing from you!

For now, I must go see to my little one, she is escaping outside and down off the porch. :) I love being a mom! *sigh*

Blessings,
Lori

My day as a mom :)

Today was good! Time with my oldest son made me smile. We were talking about The 5 Love Languages and I was trying to figure out what his was since, you know, he's a teenager and doesn't talk all that much, lol! So, we finally came to the conclusion that if I didn't spend time with him, he would have a hard time believing I loved him. Wow, what an eye-opener! I wanted to cry! He loves me, yay! *Sniff, sniff* He makes me feel so special sometimes, yet at times we really clash. Like, for instance- the fact that he never sees the little things that need to get done. *sigh* I give- do boys ever see them? Well, the only conclusion I came to was that they just need to be accepted as they are in order for them to grow into the Men that God wants them to be. So hopefully these books can help me accomplish just that! The 5 Love Languages I cannot say enough about! If we speak the opposite of what they need, it can be so devastating! I pray every day that God helps me to be the mother that these precious children need. He obviously thinks I can handle the job of raising them, but it sure is a humbling experience, let me tell ya!

So, anyway- once we finally got out of the house today to go run all the errands that needed to be run, it was noon. We drove from Goshen to New Paris to Mishawaka and on to South Bend because Kaylee was sleeping and I did not want to disturb a sleeping child. So on the drive between Mishawaka and SB, I found some property that intrigued me entirely.  There was a fence for miles with nothing but woods on the other side and it just looked like so much fun to go exploring in. And I started to wonder- when did I lose my adventurous spirit? It would've been so much fun to just go tromping around in the woods for a day with boots and a backpack of food. Although this particular area had 'NO TRESPASSING' signs plastered everywhere (I think they meant business), I could gladly find another area to head off to. Any ideas anyone? *sigh* I had to keep driving today, but it can now go on my dreams list- a day in the woods with the kids!

So, now we finally come to Mishawaka and I had a mystery shop to do, so I head off to my job and then on home. Then we get the grand idea, let's go to Lowe's and find some ideas for redecorating the boys' bedroom and the one wall in my kitchen. Oh boy! By now I'm amazed that there have been no fights or screams or any fussing for that matter! My baby is totally happy and content in the backseat, what a blessing. I thanked God for such a good day and happy kids!

We found some things we liked, lol, but it was not what I was expecting! He wants what!!!! Pink Camo- yes, you read correctly- my son wanted to decorate his room in PINK CAMO!!!  Needless to say, I made him keep looking and he did eventually find some other ideas that he liked better, whew! Funny stuff, lol. I am giving you a pic so you have an idea- THIS is what he wanted!!Ay yi yi, help me! OK, should I let him have whatever he wants? What would you do if it was your 9 year old son?

By the time we made our happy selves get out of that store and come home, it was 5 PM. We get home and I realize---my daughter has one shoe missing and a very wet, dirty sock. Now what? Back to the store we go, in search of a shoe, lol! And we found it still in the cart right where it fell off. Thank God, because He knew I needed that shoe! Jesus always provides.

I made chicken and sweet potatoes with brownies for dessert while the kiddos ran to the neighbors to play for a while. When they got home, my daughter had a bloody mouth- what! Oh boy- rambunctious son of mine! He dumped her out of the wagon on the way home!  So now we have scrapes on her face and a bump on the forehead for Easter Sunday. But she's OK, after snuggling with mom for comfort for a while after they got home, lol. He felt terrible, asking if she was going to have brain injuries. NO, she's fine but it did scare him and me! Maybe next time he will slow down, I hope?!

And now, I am tired after just typing all this. I had a very full and productive day.
Thank you Lord! Good night, my friends. Blessings to you all as we celebrate what Jesus has given us on this Easter weekend! Let's count our Blessings and Praise Him. 

Here we are on Good Friday. Our Lord suffered and dies so we can have a chance at Glory someday. Have we accepted Him and allowed Him to be Lord over our lives? Or do we still want things OUR way. Struggles, struggles...we all have them. What are mine? Hmm, belief in myself and my abilities, forgiving myself for wrongs in the past, yelling at my kids when they don't seem to be listening! UGH< hate that one! Knowing how much damage I as a parent can inflict on my children's self-esteem is a big burden for me. My oldest doesn't seem to struggle with it as much as the middle one, but still---we as parents have a huge God-given responsibility. He loaned these little ones to me to raise because he thought I could do it- will I let Him down? Will my boys know what it means to be a 'man' when they grow up? I didn't say an ADULT, I said a 'MAN'! Big difference!

To me, a man is someone who puts others' needs before his own, who works hard to provide for his family, is honest, has integrity, morals and ethics.I read this book that scared me to tears. I wept and asked God to intervene! Boys need MEN in their lives to teach and train and to be able to learn from their example how to live. The name of the book was 'Bringing up Boys' by Dr. James Dobson. He has raised his own children and has so much insight to what they need. There was also an entire chapter on Single Parents and help for us. I got really emotional because he seemed to understand the needs we have and the demands made on us. And so many times it just seems like there is no one who understands all of it! Unless you have lived it, you cannot comprehend it! As a single parent, we are in charge of everything and have all the responsibilities. Do the married people appreciate what your significant other does for you? Do you really realize all the little things they do? Stop and count what they do each day- even if they take out the trash and nothing else. Or if they went to work to provide for you and the family- did you tell them thank you? Did you tell them thank you for being a listening ear the last time they did? I guess I just want to encourage each of us to count our blessings instead of only seeing the negatives and dwelling on them. I have to stop and appreciate myself sometimes, for all the things I do on a daily basis for my kids- there's no one else here to tell me, so I need to. Give yourself permission to be happy and appreciate yourself, too! We cannot expect our spouse to fill our every need, we must take an active part in getting our needs met also! God is the one that we must depend on. If we only depend on our spouse, they will be so overwhelmed, they won't be able to function at their best. 

Here is another book I'm reminded of. Love and Respect.....the man NEEDS respect to survive and us women don't realize that, lol! We are all about Love! Love me, love me, love me! If only someone would love me, I'd be OK......is so many times the thought process of a single woman. Yet- if we haven't fully accepted the love of Christ how can we be ready for the love of a spouse? Women NEED love to survive. But what we fail to realize is that God is LOVE!!!  He is the author of Love!! He can love us like no MAN ever could! I have been shown this truth in the last year and it has been so wonderful. Yes, I may be physically alone, but God is the one who loves me and I don't feel that void of needing a man to show me that he loves me. God gives me flowers along the road that I can pick and take home for my table instead of a man to bring them to me. God gives me wonderful friends who have came over and helped me organize and clean my house in the last week when I was in need. It didn't take having a man here, it took God and Godly women who were listening to His prompting. I am so Blessed!!

Anyway- I might have overwhelmed some of you this morning. Hope it can give someone the courage to continue on, give God the Glory and enjoy life! Love and Prayers!
Lori

Hello, friends!
Here it is, Tuesday afternoon and I want to get out into the sunshine. How many of you are enjoying that today? I have slept quite a bit last night and today since I didn't get much the other night after making a trip to get baby checked out. The baby is happily growing and all is fine, except for the fact  that mom is ready to be a little smaller, lol! Did anyone else have a hard time with names? I still don't really know what to use and I only have a little more than 2 weeks to go. I have a baby name book, but it did not help much. So not my type of names. Then again- what is my type? 

Yesterday I was BLESSED by a good friend- she came into my house and helped me organize my bedroom closets (she's a genius) and then watched Kaylee for me so I could go do some jobs I had lined up and she did my dishes, laundry and cleaned the floors. Oh, and pinned my son's underwear up on the bulletin board! Hilarious lady! And did I mention that she brought me chocolate? Wow- she definitely spoke my love language! Having someone clean my house is amazing! I am so thankful for her. I have never had the courage to ask for help much and she just showed me how nice it can be to allow others to use their talents when mine simply are not working! I think I might ask again when I need it, and I'm guessing it might be sooner rather than later since I'm having baby #4 in the next few weeks and will be alone after the 2 week stay my mom is planning to give me. Good Lord help me, I have no idea how I will survive this.

I think it hit me really hard the other night when I faced the thought that it might be time for this baby to show up. Wow- wake up call. God promises never to give us more than we can handle, right? Well, he's given me a new perspective on this verse lately. He means 'He won't give us more than we can handle without leaning on him for support!' So, how do I handle an 18 month old, a 9 yr old, find work, pay for daycare, and take care of the house and meals? I have no idea. I know I will have plenty of opportunities to laugh at myself. I have to- sometimes I take myself WAY too seriously. I KNOW!!! So, God is in control and he will send help in times of trouble, he's done it. He will get the bills paid when I am at the end of my rope- he's done it! He will show me how to do something when I am clueless- he's done it b4!!! God is an awesome God and we should never forget it. Sometimes I wonder what he thinks I'm made of. He obviously thinks I can handle more than I think I can. Whew!

So- the message of the day- BE ENCOURAGED!!! GOD is in CONTROL and he holds us in the palm of his hand. He loves us more than we can imagine. So- chin up everyone, you are loved with an everlasting love!!

Wishing you God's richest Blessings for you and your loved ones!
Lori

Learned something new!

So I learned something just now- I was having fun with this little Amazon button I found, lol, and realized I can actually make a commission if you guys buy books through my site and links. Woohoo! So, hope you like some books I put up, God knows I can use all the help I can find. Haha, I just realized also- this is just more incentive for me to read instead of playing my Country Life game on facebook. How's that for a winner? Anyone wanna join me? Reading contest? Anyone? I can't hear you! :)

Love u!

OH WOW!!! Here is one of my absolute favorites!! Dani Johnson...if you are serious about changing your life- you've got to listen to this. Whether you get it here ar some other way- AWESOME teaching on the Word of God!!!! She has been through so much but she never gave up, she just trusted God to bring her through, even through a debilitating illness that the Dr's wanted to put her on drugs for. She said "It's not an option to live on drugs for the rest of my life- God, you're going to heal me." And he did!!! Wonderful stories and teachings! I actually listen to her about 3-4 times a week when I need a good pick-me-upper. Hope you enjoy!

So here I am at 1AM, with no kiddos in the house! Woohoo, OK maybe not. I actually went to the ER last night because baby was not cooperating, but all is well! We are fine and back home, but since the kids were already sleeping at a friend's house, she said they could just stay till the morning. So what am I doing wide awake? Hmm, thinking and working I guess!

I am ever so thankful for my blessings! When we came home from church today, I had the boys help me get lunch ready. We made chicken fingers, (yes, from scratch) asparagus, and had some home canned applesauce- we ate and cleaned everything up by 1:30 PM. Then it was time to relax! And how nice it was, let me tell ya! I just enjoy my time to talk and get to know the boys- we always eat at the table and I never realized that other families don't until I was having a conversation with a lady who works with families on a regular basis. It blew me away- how many people miss out on that special time by watching tv or whatever they do, I guess? What else is there to do? I just don't know- it's always been that way for me. If we don't sit at the table, it's rare and feels funny, lol!

So now here I sit- reflecting on my latest reading materials. :) I am reading a series by Hannah Alexander hat I am enjoying so entirely!!! This is the second book in the series, the first one is called Second Opinionsorry, kinda backwards, I know! ut- that's me, seemingly can't get organized since I've had a baby and have another one on the way!

How DO people stay organized with little ones that constantly drag everything out again? I would love to know!!

 So anyway- back to my books......they have given me a new appreciation for Dr.'s and hospitals. Whoa! They have some stress to deal with! Ordinary people can get pretty verbally abusive when put into bad situations or under stress. an you imagine? They catch it all- they are smack in the middle of crises every minute of every day. It is what they are trained to do, yet these books have just given me a new perspective and appreciation for them. If you have to go to the hospital someday, please remember this, lol! Treat the Dr.'s and nurses with some respect and compassion, they are doing the best they can and they literally hold your life in their hands sometimes!

So, I think I should really get to bed. I still have to get up at 6:30 AM and make sure my 9 yr old gets to the bus OK. Yikes! I will be tired. Hope you all enjoyed reading this tonight. I didn't feel very newsy, maybe I need sleep. Praise God, I'm home and not in the hospital bed waiting for this baby to make his/her appearance. God is GOOD!!!

Oh boy- my head is swimming with all kinds of things I'd like to say. Where do I begin?

The book- 5 Love Languages- whoa! I thought I remembered what it said, but I was wrong! Sheesh! Yes, it says it's for couples and why am I reading it when there's no man here? Well, because I love people and this book also helps me understand other people's love languages. For example- I have this wonderful friend who I was so confused about. I could tell there were some hurts going on inside, but I just couldn't figure out how to help her. One day we got on the subject of this book and she said her love language was 'words of affirmation' ! Blew me away! I never would've guessed! To me, she always seems to be cool, calm and collected- almost as if she never needs anything. Oh, what I would do to be like that, lol! But- we all need to be loved. By friends, spouses, kids, parents, and anyone we come into contact with. The clerk at the store- are they rude? Did they possibly have a bad day and are just taking it out on you because you happened to be in front of them at that time? Usually when someone treats us badly, it's because of an issue within themselves, which helps me to overlook things. But it still can be really hurtful!

As it says in Luke 6:28 Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. 6:35 Love your enemies, do good, lend, hoping for nothing in return.....
6:37 Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you shall be forgiven.
OK, maybe I'm not perfect in the quotations, but we get the drift. These verses kinda slapped me in the face this morning. I have issues to deal with, forgiveness to seek and love to give. Is it easy to follow these rules? Not really, but easier than the alternative, I think! I can't wait to hear God say "Well done, my good and faithful servant." This is what I strive for.

And how did I get on this subject again? Oh yeah, loving others. How can we show love to others when we need so much? Well, that answer for me has been- seek God, he promises to fulfill all our needs!! And he does!! God has shown me LOVE in this last year like never before. He has gotten me out of bed and said "I have something for you" and I could not disobey! I felt his physical presence with me in my room and I was Blessed beyond what I have ever thought possible. When someone says God doesn't speak to them, I know it is only because they do not know how to hear him. God speaks to us everyday- if only we would listen. Dani Johnson talks about that quite a bit on her cd's. How she came from where she was completely broken to being restored through Christ. I give God all the Glory for what He has done in me. I would never have made it these last 2 years without leaning on him entirely. Someone once said to me, "WE who HAVE to lean on God are more Blessed than those who are self-sufficient and independent." I think she's right, but it's till hard when you've been so independent your whole life.

I feel like I'm rambling now, so I will go get some lunch and wish you all a good day. My daughter is taking her nap and I plan to enjoy these next few minutes of silence. :)

God Bless all of you!
Lori

OK, so now I plan to start reading every day. The books that I know are going to help propel me in the right direction for my life. I think I will start with 'The Five Love Languages' since I sometimes wonder if I remember how to treat others. I know I have so much pain to deal with that sometimes it overshadows the needs of others. Today I had a scary episode.

My little princess is teething.....yeah! So, mom isn't feeling good and she is getting everything she's NOT supposed to! We moms know how that goes, right? My lack of patience combined with her grumpiness was not a great and fun day. But- by the Grace of God, we made it and I am now thankful that He brought me through it.
Anyway- by this afternoon when her incessant whining was really getting to me, I almost lost all control. I seriously wanted to punch something. But I couldn't find anything I was willing to hit, lol! I won't destroy my house, hitting my daughter wasn't even a thought!!!! and so I was without options, which made me laugh and renewed my sanity! If there had been a .....what do you call those bags you hang from the ceiling?.....yeah, one of those- if I had one in my house, it would have been put to good use today! :)

So long story short- it made me realize that something has to change! I didn't used to be like this. I never lost my temper before all this crap with my ex! The 'stuff' has to be dealt with!! No matter what! Even my boys tell me I'm different, well yeah- granted I went through a bunch of junk in the last 2 years and it is still a lot to deal with every day. The fact that I am pg isn't really a huge help, lol! I can't do all the things I would if I wasn't. But this too shall pass so endure it I will!

Do any other moms have episodes like this? If so, I'd really like to hear about them. I might feel a little more normal then, lol! Tonight I feel like a winner for getting through the day, but I also can't help but look back and wish I hadn't yelled when I did. Wish I had loved on her more or just put my own work on the back burner. But unfortunately, there is no one else that's going to do my work. Darn, huh? This is my life and God must really think I am something if he believes I can handle this day after day! 'Cause I'm not so sure. ;)

So I am now going into my own little world- u see this picture on top of my page? God made this scene and I plan on just meditating on it and thanking Him for His love and asking for a renewal of strength for tomorrow. God loves us all and He made these nature scenes for us to enjoy. So even if I'm not physically there, I can enjoy it and realize that someone else WAS there.......can you hear the birds? The sound of water running over the rocks.....the feel of the mist...awesome, so relaxing!

Hope you all have a wonderful night and a Blessed day tomorrow! Love, Lori

Hello, America!

Today is the first day of the rest of our lives! What will we do with it? It is up to me and each of you how you will spend it. I have my to-do list, but it doesn't always get completely done. As long as I have prioritized and I get the most important things done, I can't stress over the rest. I have little ones that need their mom and they are number 1 on my to-do list. And- speaking of, my 18 month old is screaming to get out of bed, lol! Later, my friends!